Has your spouse told you directly or indirectly they want a divorce? Are you in the divorce process, thinking about it, or unsure if you even want it or not?
Divorce can be one of life’s most difficult events (been there, done that!), negatively affecting your self-confidence, finances, emotional and mental wellbeing, not to mention your relationships with friends and family. Maybe you’re considering divorce, in the middle of a divorce, or trying to heal and recover from a recent divorce.
If you’re considering divorce, no one can really tell you the right answer about what to do. Sure, you have friends and family who have gone through a divorce. However, their advice isn’t exactly helping you make the most effective decision for yourself which unfortunately leads to confusion and mixed feelings.
In the beginning, even considering divorce can be a scary thought, especially when the needs of children are also involved. Fear and conflict avoidance can paralyze you from making timely decisions for yourself and others.
If your spouse has decided to ask you for a divorce, you might feel blindsided, or experiencing feelings of sadness, anger, and rejection. If you’ve been cheated on, you may also be feeling a double amount of pain from both the affair and the divorce.
If you experienced divorce recently or some time ago, and still carrying the pain, considering divorce counseling is a healthy way to heal. Maybe you find yourself still holding onto your relationship even after they’ve moved on. You may fear that you’ll never find another relationship again. This is not unusual and just means you might have some emotional baggage that needs to be addressed before you can make yourself available to someone else.
Whether you are contemplating divorce, going through the divorce process, or trying to rebuild and heal your life after divorce, we are here to help you.
You are not alone in experiencing divorce. Many couples experience feelings of disconnection which eventually lead to divorce. Unfortunately, most couples aren’t taught to effectively manage relationship problems growing up, so they only work with what they know.
Sometimes circumstances within a marriage have been difficult for a long time, and you see yourselves repeating the same argument and conflict patterns over and over. Most couples don’t want to continue fighting, yet they move on without counseling in order to avoid dealing with difficult topics. This is very common, as many couples don’t realize that their marriage is deteriorating over time because of this breakdown in communication. These unhealthy patterns of communication can be difficult to recognize over multiple years. The more you slowly drift farther and farther apart from each other, the more the problems between you quietly grow larger than the two of you.
Going through the divorce process, you may start feeling less confident, rejection by your significant other, and feelings of failure. Blaming yourself is common and normal. Because divorce is like a death of a relationship, you may feel some amount of grief and disillusionment. Fears that you’ll be alone forever and never being able to find another relationship partner again may start creeping in, keeping you up late at night wondering if you’ll ever be happy again.
Feelings of fear that you’ll never be good enough for someone else are normal and typical in a divorce situation. However, unresolved emotional attachment to your relationship, partner, or family, may create prolonged pain, preventing you from living your best life.
It may be difficult to believe now but you really can get past this part of your life and be happy. With the help of a compassionate and experienced (both professionally and personally) divorce therapist, feelings of happiness and empowerment will start to return to you, enabling you to have a bright and successful future. Allowing you to have hope.
It’s important to me to help make your counseling experience a positive one. This might be the first chance you’ve had to tell your side of the story to another person without judgment or conflict. During the first session, we’ll work together to identify the issues that brought you in for counseling and then set goals you’d like to reach while you continue to grow in your counseling experience.
New to counseling? No problem! We’ll work through any worries or perceptions about counseling that might be slowing your progress. We’ll discuss your relationship and personal history, identifying patterns we might want to consider as we create a plan of action to help you heal and move forward in your life.
For example, maybe you have lingering feelings from the past, about you and your spouse when things were happier and working well. Divorce therapy helps you get your life back by accepting how things have changed. Other factors which contribute to feelings of fear and despair which might need to be worked through include, your children, loss of your family, or maybe your own parents’ divorce.
We will work together to help you navigate the divorce and approach it in a respectful way. If there are issues about child custody and co-parenting you are worried about, we’ll look at those together. As a team we will help you figure out the best path forward to work with your former spouse.
I also help men work at undoing the pain and damage caused by divorce, creating a renewed feeling of hope in a brighter future. I also help men regain faith in themselves, enabling them to start dating again, and yes, have a great relationship again.
Many guys rediscover that they like meeting new people and no longer carry the weight of their marriage or divorce process.
Together we can help you create the peace of mind you’ve looking for, getting you back to feeling happy, fulfilled, and empowered.
Guys who have previously worked with me have described feeling much more balanced and more in control of their lives. These current and former clients say they are more aware of their negative core beliefs, and now have the skills to proactively deal with their present and future situations.
My practice, The Men’s Center for Counseling and Coaching is unique to meeting the needs of men. I understand guys and their relationships and over many years, have helped empower dozens of men to successfully move through the divorce process.
My main purpose is to validate your fears and concerns about the divorce, help you feel less alone, get you back on your feet, and feel more in control of your personal divorce journey.
Yes, divorce can be costly and challenging, resulting in you possibly feeling overwhelmed with mental-emotional stress, and preventing you from making the clearest, best decisions for yourself. That is why divorce counseling is needed to help you overcome the inevitable difficulties, moving you through the divorce process with clarity and peace.
There are a variety reasons for a lack of success in therapy. Sometimes the therapeutic relationship between client and therapist is not established early, which can stall progress. The counselor just may not have been the right fit for you. It happens sometimes. Perhaps you only worked on developing coping skills but didn’t get to the root causes of your behaviors and symptoms. I’d like to help you and I’m glad you’re reconsidering counseling, with me as your counselor and coach.
I sincerely care about your situation and yes, I can relate to divorce on a personal level. Thus, I really want to see you succeed because I believe you deserve to be happy again. If you’re ready to take that first step to start divorce counseling, If you have more questions, call me at 336-423-7697 or contact me here to schedule a free consultation We’re conveniently located in Draper, right by I-15 for your convenience.